I wrote this light-hearted jibe to give straight people an inkling (for the few moments it takes to read it) of what it feels like to be got at in the subtle and insidious way we gays were all our lives before GLF changed everything. I originally made it up as I was painting it on a foyer wall during the world's first ever season of gay plays where it caused such a sensation that I subsequently published it as a fund-raising poster for Gay Sweatshop, the London theatre group I was a founder member of. I've heard of sightings of my poster from New York to New Zealand, Sydney to Sao Paulo and discovered it on numerous Internet pages. It was even angrily quoted during a debate in the House of Lords! Please note that I wrote it as a contribution to the gay community and have never earned a penny from it - but do ask for my name to be included as the author in any reproductions.